I hate myself..

I hate myself, for not fighting when you left.

I hate myself, for letting you go.

I hate myself, for not saying anything.

I hate myself, for what I have become.

I hate myself, for wanting to hate you.

I hate myself more, for not being able to hate you.

I hate myself the most, for still wanting to be with you.

But why I really hate myself, is coz I know you hate me too..

What happened?

Whenever I am down and need a little pull,
I look for you, with expectations full..
But I can't help, but get hurt when I see,
That you are not there, you are not there for me..

When I am all alone and need someone the most,
You will be there for me, is what I used to boast..
But you are no longer there at the time of my need,
Why can't you feel my pain or see my heart bleed?

I was a fool to think you ll abandon me never,
But how was I to know that things would change forever..
That the friendship we built over the past years,
Would end up being the reason for all my tears..

I know you care for me, deep within your heart,
And I wish there was some way to have a brand new start..
But we have managed to go apart, so farther away,
It doesn't really feel fair, to show my dismay..

It's hard to imagine we were best friends once,
But all that's left is some kind of acquaintance..
I wish there was some way, to turn back time,
When the joy of our friendship was a reason to rhyme..

But seeing how you are moving away, everyday a little more,
I really want to hate you from deep within my core,
But I could never do that, no matter what you do,
And so I hate myself, for what you put me through..

I'll be there for you..

Like all the things involving the heart,
You just drown in the happiness, right from the start,
And you get a jolt when you realize that it’s time to part,
Coz that’s when you feel something getting ripped apart..

When somebody you love leaves, you start to face your fears,
And all that’s left is the memories of yesteryears,
I wish I could just wipe away those tears,
Or at the least be there to lend some listening ears…

The love you had will always course through your vein,
And the memories will turn from blessings to bane,
But you will have to learn to move on with the pain,
Hoping that someday the memories will wane…

All I wanted to do was be there for you,
To stand by you so that you don’t feel so blue,
I started to see the things between us going askew,
But I really had no clue on what I could do..

Whenever I look at the pain in your eyes,
I wish I could say something really nice,
Something, that would make you realize,
That there is no use in breaking all the ties..

I know you wish for things to somehow get right,
Just believe in your love and put up a fight,
But when everything seems bleak and you are looking for a light,
Remember this friend just waiting out of sight..

Friends forever?

Kitni Ajeeb hai ye dosti humari,
ki itne paas hoke bhi itni door ho chuke hai..
har din saath rehne par bhi,
baat bhi nahi kar paate hain..

Ek doosre ke saath waqt guzaarte hain,
par ek doosre ke liye nahi..
ek doosre ko apna maante hain,
par wo apnapan hi raha nahi..

teri har raaz main jaana karta tha,
ab to teri koi khabar bhi nahi,
tere har dukh ka sahara tha,
ab to teri khushi ka bhi hissa nahi..

dost bante waqt na jaane kya socha tha,
ab na jaane kahan aa pahunche hain hum..
tera khaas dost hua karta tha,
ab to sirf ek pehchaan reh gaye hain hum..

The answer to why it's you...

The day I set my eyes upon you,
I knew my feelings were deep and true,
Every moment that I spend with you,
Is special, exciting and something new!

Seeing your face so sweet & bright,
Makes all my troubles feel alright,
So I long to see you - a glimpse or a passing sight,
And end up dreaming about you - day and night!

From your beautiful eyes that make a lovely pair,
To the sight of your hands combing your wet hair,
From the twinkling smile that you always wear,
To our laughs & talks that is oh so rare!

When you are sitting in front of me, all nice and sweet,
I can hardly make myself sit calmly in my seat,
Coz your mere presence makes my heart skip a beat,
There is no one else who can boast such a feat!

You are sweet, funny, interesting and clever,
I wonder if I will find someone like you, ever,
That's why I wish I could be with you forever,
Now.. here.. whenever.. wherever..

PyAr...

Dikhate ho ki tumko farak nahi padta hai,
par fikra to saara chehre pe hi nazar aa jaata hai..
pyaar hai magar poori aazadi hai kehte ho,
par kisi aur ke saath waqt guzaaren to undar hi undar jalte ho..

pyaar hai pata hai, dikhane ki koi zaroorat nahi,
phir bhi jab kabhi dikhta nahi, to dono rooth jaate ho sahi..
kehte ho ki har pal saath rehane ki chahat nahi,
par jab saath nahi ho to kuch aur soch paate nahi..

"pyaar to bahut hai sirf baatein thode kam hain" bolte ho,
phir bhi jab jagda karte ho to poori tarah se chup ho jaate ho..
Jaante ho pyaar ki buniyaad barose aur ehsaas dilane mein hi hai,
Phir bhi ek doosre se khulke pyaar karne se hichkichate ho..

Tumare pyaar pe poora barosa hai hume,
Kaash wahi barosa apne pyaar mein hota tume,
Tumari ye prem kahani jeet jaayegi poori,
Par uske liye ek doosre pe barosa hai zaroori..

Boss..

Bosses like you are hard to find,
Sometimes stern and sometimes kind,
Someone who pushes the body and mind,
Yet ensures fun and work are combined.
So on this special and wonderful day,
I am sending this beautiful wish your way,
Hope you get happiness and success everyday,
Wishing you the best and a very Happy Birthday!

Yaad kaise karun...

Chahta hoon tumare saath aur waqt guzaarun,
Par tume mujhse milne ka fursat nahi milta,
Tum chahte ho ki har pal tume yaad karta rahun,
Par tume bhulna ka mujhe mauka nahi milta...

If only...

If only you could see,
What you mean to me...
If only you knew,
All the things I'd do for you...
If only I could explain,
How much it really pains...
To do what it takes,
For a dear friend's sake...
To do what is must,
Just coz it feels just...
To hold back ur love and care,
Even when it feels unfair...
But I'll do this & more,
Without the slightest thought,
And I ll do all this,
Just because its you...

Har din, har pal...

Har din har pal teri yaad sathathi hai,
Na jaane tu itni yaad kyun aati hai...
Socha tha bhul jaaunga wo chan dinon ki dosti,
Par kaise bhul paaunga zindagi ke sabse hasin dosti...

Kaash tum dekh paate ke kitna akele ho gaya hoon,
Kaash tum samajhte ki kitna tume doondhta hoon,
Jab aaye the mere zindagi mein, to kuch le kar nahi aaye,
Par chodke jab chale, to sari khusiyan chura le gaye...

Ab batak raha hoon zindagi ke raahon mein tanha,
Khoj raha hoon kisi ko jo tumko bhula saken,
Khwahish to yahi hai ki tum laut aaoge abhi,
Par kaise dil ke samjhaun ki ye ho na paayega kabhi...

Someone...

For all the times I have been alone,
I wish I had someone to call my own,
To love, to care,
To always be there,
To be a part of my weakness,
To be source of my strengths,
Someone who is special among all my friends,
Someone with whom I can sit & have talks,
And sometimes go on silent long walks,
Someone to argue, someone who would disagree,
But when it comes to help, is always there for me..
Someone sweet, someone nice,
Whose presence adds a bit of spice...
Will I ever find that special someone?
That someone who answers all my needs?

A fresh start...

Dil pe koi bhoj hai, use halka karna chahta hoon,
Kahin unkahe dard hain, unhe mitana chahta hoon,
Chaaron taraf kohra hai, use hatana chahta hoon,
Jahan bhi dekhun andhere hai, roshni ki ek kiran chahta hoon,
Bandhe hue se lag raha hai, chootke nikalna chah raha hoon,
Ghutan si mehasoos ho rahi hai, aazad hona chah raha hoon,
Aaj kahin dino baad, phir se jeena chah raha hoon...

Alone in the crowd...

Aaj is bheed mein khudko akele paa raha hoon,
Itne doston ke saath hote bhi ek sahara doondh raha hoon,
Apnon ke beech rehke bhi paraya lag raha hai,
Aaj na jaane meri zindagi mein kyun ek kami lag rahi hai,
Ab sab se door koi tanhayi chah raha hoon,
Khudke saath guzaarne kuch waqt chah raha hoon,
Apne hi khayalon mein kho jaana chahta hoon,
Apne uljhe hue vicharon ko suljana chahta hoon...

My true friend...

Here I am standing, with my head held high,
Looking longingly at the vast blue sky,
Wishing for the Gods to hear my plea,
Waiting for the raindrops to pour on me...
To wash away the tears brimming my eyes,
Hoping the rain would give some disguise,
You have been my only true friend,
Always trying to bring my sorrows to an end,
Here I am standing, with my head held high,
Calling out to you and waiting your reply,
Rain rain, come again...
Come again, to wash my pain...

Baarish...

Aaj is baarish mein mujhe bheegne do,
Dil mein dabe dard ko thoda gulne do,
Mere aansuon ko barsaat mein behne do,
Aaj... mujhe khulke rone do...

Kaash...

Kaash tumko samja paata,
Ki tumari fikir kitna karta hoon,
Kaash tum dekh paate,
Ki tumare liye kitna rota hoon,
Kaash tume bata paata,
Ki kitna tume chahta hoon,
Kaash tum jaan paate,
Ki kitna is dosti ko manta hoon…

Dear Friend...

Hum to hamesha se hain tumare raazdar,
Par tum khoj rahe ho ek humdard kahin aur,
Samjte hain hum ki tumko uljan hai koi,
Maante hain ki tumko dard bhi hai kahin.
Inki ehsaas hone se hi hum bhi hain dukhi,
Kya tumko humari ye bedardi bilkul nahi dikhi?
Na jaane kya hua chan dino ke beech,
Humse kuch bhi kehne ka ab hai tumko koi hitchkich,
Darr hai ki aa gayi hai hum mein koi doori,
Achanak se lagta hai ki is dosti mein hai kuch adoori,
Samjo mere baat aur jasbaat ko poori,
Mujhe ye dosti hai bahut hi jyada pyari!

Beauty beyond imagination...

Hume fakr tha apne kaboo par,
Hume vishwaas tha apne dil par,
Phir tum aaye in nazron ke saamne.
Us khubsoorati ko labson se kaise bayyan karun,
Is madhoshi ko kaise main kaboo karun,
Ab dil ko kya dosh dena,
Tumare is husn ko dekhne ke baad,
Aaj to dil ka bhi ye bewafayi maaf hai!

Wont you give me a try?

Mujhse tumara ye dukh dekha nahi jaata,
Tere haseen aankhon mein aansu saha nahi jaata,
Shayad main teri wafa ka kaabil nahi,
Par mujhe aasmake dekho, main itna bhura bhi nahi

Lost & Found...

Ek dost kya hai samjha,
Teri dosti paa kar,
Dard kya hai jaana,
Tera saath kho kar!